My Little Pony

It's like being in a tormented love affair, doing this cyclocross thing.

Some days I race and finish feeling glorious and giddy and in love. And other times I race and finish feeling overwhelmed and a little sad and confused.
It's so up and down. He loves me, he loves me not.

I can't keep starting in the back. That call up stuff is cool and all when you get called up, but between the 10 B's and the 10 master's, there were 2o women up there. And so the rest of us were like little beggar children vying for crumbs behind the royalty.
Alms for the poor please.

On the first lap my first trick was a pole dance. I saw it there, right after my re "mount" from the barriers and I felt an urge to shimmy right up to it. I heard Lulu somewhere out yonder saying something like she should get off that pole.
Get off it momma!

Who rides into a pole going 5 miles an hour? And how does that course tape get so wrapped around the handlebars so fast?
That was a course for a little power engine, like a clydesdale maybe. I think I'm more of a little pony or maybe a gazelle or a baby giraffe or something. Or maybe a flamingo.
A flamingo with crazy eyes.

So the next lap comes and I race around and around and the next trick I perform is the "upside down, my little pony" trick. It's where I'm almost up one of the hills, up and up... and then I fall side ways and slide a bit on my back with my feet still attached and bike above me.
No stopping, I hear a racer behind me say.
Really? I think to myself. Because that was my "upside down, my little pony" trick and I did it to try and distract you.

There I was, my little pony, all upside down and stuff.

And then the next lap comes. And I race around and around some more and Katrina, the VeloBella with whom I've been trading places with at the last few races, does an endo in front of me and it looks uncomfortable.
And I kind of slow down and ask if she's alright and she says no. But then she hops right back on her bike and takes off more determined then ever and she gets smaller and smaller as she churns away from me on that damn asphalt straight away.
Hmm, I think to myself. She knows that my little pony trick too. But this time, I was the one who fell for it.

Well shit.
And then the next lap comes and I'm barely churning and starting to crack and weaken because I can feel the love affair slowly ending with each pedal stroke. And I can hear my name, but I can't see who's calling me. Where am I, who am I? Why yes, I'm a little pony. And why yes, I think it's the course who's calling me. Yes, it is! It's saying my name over and over. And it's saying PEDAL, PEDAL harder!


But then I realize that it's Aron, from Scycip.

And then the next lap comes and I get passed some more and then it's over. And the course spits me out and I roll over to the bushes. And the love affair is over for the week, until next Sunday when we'll fall in love again.
And sure as clockwork, when I get back to the tent, someone hands me a beer.